The Window

Remember the old saying, “When God closes a door, He opens a window”? I HATED that saying during my teenage years. So many things happened in my life during that time, and this was my mother’s wisdom in each and every disappointment.

I just could not understand how you could be so sure of one thing and all of a sudden, the door is not only closed, but Locked. It wasn’t until I was in my mid twenties that I finally understood what my mother was saying.

Now, I know this is going to shock most of you, but I have a flare for the dramatic. My whole life I have thrived on entertaining others. Growing up, my sister and I would dress in gaudy made up costumes and put on a performance for anyone who would watch…. usually that was just our cat. I adored, and still do, being the center of attention. Hearing people laugh at my stories, corny jokes, and absolute silliness is where I feel most alive.

It never bothered me to stand in front of a crowd, perform on stage, or have to give a presentation. I was BORN a natural Star!

Having the red hair only fueled my desire to be the next Lucille Ball. Her comedy is total genius, and given the wackiness of my day to day life, I could totally relate to her.  My mind was made up…. I was going to be famous!

My junior year I applied to the Tennessee  Governor’s School for the Arts. This was a 4 week program in the summer that would allow me to study and focus on my talent along with 50 other talented kids in Tennessee. I was a shoo in!  I mean come on!!!!!!!

My audition/ interview just happened to come on my birthday. Life could not get any better. My BFF at the time went and auditioned to because it’s just what BFF’s do.  She could have cared less about Governor’s school, she just wanted to live away from home for the summer with her BFF.  I killed the audition and left with the confidence that I would be getting my acceptance letter SOON.

Boy was I wrong.

4 Weeks later I came home to my mother already there… holding a VERY thin letter from the Governor’s School Council.

I didn’t make it.  WHAT???? Could they NOT see talent when it was displayed in front of them?????  Angry, I called my BFF….fully expecting she had received her rejection letter as well.

Again… I was wrong.

The girl who could have cared less about performing, or Governor’s School, had been accepted.

I was CRUSHED.
I was ANGRY.
I was BITTER.
I was a BIG BABY.

For weeks, I moped, pouted, whined, cried, denied, laid around, and everything else a 17 year old does when she doesn’t get her way.  Each day my mother said the same thing…

“When God closes a door, He opens a window”

I didn’t care about doors, windows, or any other silly quotes. I was mad and I was going to pout it out.

Of course my mother had a come to Jesus meeting with me and made me suck it up REAL quick once she got tired of my childish dramatic ways.

Since I was not going to be attending Governor’s School, I was to find a job.

Wonderful.

Luckily a lady in my church needed a sitter for her 4 year old. M-F 8-5.  Whatever, maybe I could sulk while the kid played.

Little did I know, this one disappointment would totally change my life.

Soon I learned I LOVED children. I  LOVED seeing their faces when they learned something new that I had taught. It was a wonderful summer filled with precious memories.

I entered college as a Theatre major. I thought that is what I was meant to do. However, I could never quiet be happy with any of my classes or accomplishments. After two years at a Community College, I received a Theatre Scholarship to Middle Tennessee State University (MTSU), which ironically is where Governor’s School for the Arts is housed each summer.  The same people who had rejected me, now wanted me.

The thrill was not there.

I was miserable. The only joy I found was working part time at Preschool.  I actually LOVED going to work. After about 3 months of being miserable, I realized what I had to do…

I dropped out of the Theatre program and applied for the Early Childhood Education Program.

This was my window.

Me and my collage roommate, and fellow teacher, showing off our gaudy and wonderful teacher décor. 

 

For 15 glorious years I helped shape some of the most incredible young minds. Each day I was challenged, I was blessed, and I got to use my talents in a way I hadn’t thought of before.

On a field trip with one of my precious students.

 

So just because the door is closed or locked , I am living proof that God is ALWAYS going to give you an open window.  Disappointment may last for a while, but keep your head up and your eyes open…. your purpose may be just outside that window.

Daily Prompt

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5 thoughts on “The Window

  1. Pingback: NaPoWriMo – Day 21 – “Wicked Business” by David Ellis | toofulltowrite (I've started so I'll finish)

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