I have never been one to join the crowd. The thought of being like everyone else makes me…well…irritated. Personally, I like to stand out….go opposite the flow, against the Grain.
Perhaps it is my cocky nature that compels me to go against the natural flow of things. Or maybe I am just not smart and chose to do things the long and difficult way. Either way, at the end of the day, I am me and that is all that matters.
At the ripe ole age of 41 I am still walking in the opposite direction of everyone else. By the time one reaches my age I should already be on my 2nd house, been married at least 15 years, have 2.5 kids, and have already lived out my childhood fantasies.
Of course, in true Jessica fashion, I have failed to walk the “route” of life.
I don’t own my home, never been married, no kids except the fur kind, and I am just now branching out to accomplish and live out my dreams. Apparently I didn’t get the memo.
So I am often looked at in pity by those who take the time to look upon my life. I am seen as someone who clearly has something wrong with her.
“Why aren’t you married?”
“Don’t you WANT to be married?
“Who is going to take care of you when you’re old if you don’t have kids?”
“Why don’t you own a house”
“Aren’t you TOO old to be setting out on adventures?”
If I had a $1 for each and every time I am asked these and other ridiculous questions, I could retire to beaches of Hawaii right now. Folks just can’t fathom that I am STILL single and NOT sitting at home in the evenings drowning in my sorrow. It is impossible for them to think my life is fulfilled without a husband and 2.5 kids.
It’s just not NORMAL!!!
No, maybe it’s not the “Norm”, but I could not imagine my life any other way either. Don’t get me wrong, I dreamed of having the husband and the kids when I was younger, and who’s to say it won’t happen someday, but my life is not defined by my acquiring a husband and having kids.
When I was in my 20’s and all my friends were getting hitched and having babies, I admit, I got angry with God. REALLY angry. Why couldn’t I have what they had? Why, just once, couldn’t I walk the same way as everyone else? I pouted and retreated to my little cocoon of pity. Gorging myself on Diet Cherry Coke and Little Debbie’s. It did not take long to realize… I was pathetic. Life was going on around me and I was MISSING it, because I was consumed about what I didn’t have, instead of focusing on what I DID have.
What I did have was time. Time to explore and do the things I wanted to do . Time to enjoy life at my own pace and leisure. Time to realize what it was I REALLY wanted.
No longer was I angry and bitter about the path I was on. I rejoiced in it! There was nothing or no one to hold me back. There is a big ole world to explore, and I want to see all I can of it.
So going against the status quo is not bad. When everyone else is going east, I will probably be headed West, and I am totally cool with that. Life is not about following a set pattern, or steps 1,2,3. No, it is about living to the fullest, embracing each day, not whining about what you don’t have, but using and cultivating what you DO have.
In a nutshell, I am a 41 year old, who isn’t married, doesn’t have kids, talks to her dog like she’s human, eats cereal and pop tarts for dinner, plays in the mud, and when she sees a field full of flowers, lies down in them to take a selfie.
I may not be normal, but I sure am happy!!!!!!!!!!!